Sunday, October 12, 2003

My Journey Has Ended Here...Moving on...
This is my Last Insight. My journey has ended here and moving on to a new location. I was browsing through my past archives. My blog has undergone multiple visual uplifts and phases of insights.

In July, I embarked on this jouney and stated an objective. The purpose of my blogging needs.
1. To be able to provide an enriching and educational avenue for fellow blogger peepers on ME..:), Special Needs Culture and hmmm...more to come..Insya ALLAH

It seems that I can't lie...my heart feels, my brain dances and my fingers did the talking. They were in parallel and unison. My fingers "expressed" what I felt....and what's dancing in my mind. I can't lie.

The Transition
Phase 1- A part of my life. The Special Needs Culture.
Phase 2- Revealing of my Unguarded Hearts.
Phase 3- Now. Visual Expression of my love to HIM, The Almighty. My heart which will stay guarded by HIM.
Phase 4- The Embarkation. Embarking on a blissful journey. HIS other plans for me. Phase 4 will move to a new location.

The Transition
I'm closing the chapter of my life journey here,
as I am embarking on a blissful journey,
which HE has planned for me.
HIS plans are coming into place.
I have moved to a new abode and creating a new living attic.
The sacred month is here, i'll focus my attention on HIM.
No distractions. Insya Allah.
Come December, departing to render my service...
and to learnt from it.
Come next year, I will be left alone to nurture my ownself.
To nurture my own needs and wants.
Dear friends, If we meet, it is with HIS permission.
If we don't, it is because HE has other plans for us.
Wassalam

-Doa Perpisahan by Brothers
extracted from a Sister's blog
-chorus-
Kan Ku Utuskan Salam Ingatanku
Dalam Doa Kudusku Sepanjang Waktu
Ya Allah Bantulah Hamba Mu
Mencari Hidayah Daripada Mu
Dalam Mendidikkan Kesabaranku
Ya Allah Tabahkan Hati Hamba Mu
Di Atas Perpisahan Ini

Pertemuan Kita Di Suatu Hari
Menitiskan Ukhwah Yang Sejati
Bersyukurku Ke Hadrat Ilahi
Di Atas Jalinan Yang Suci
Namun Kini Perpisahan Yang Terjadi
Dugaan Yang Menimpa Diri
Bersabarlah Di Atas Suratan
Ku Tetap Pergi Jua

Senyuman Yang Tersirat Di Bibirmu
Menjadi Ingatan Setiap Waktu
Tanda Kemesraan Bersimpul Padu
Kenangku Di Dalam Doamu

Semoga Tuhan Berkatimu

Silence is Golden. Goodbye.
For the choosen ones...we'll meet again. Insya Allah.
Insomniac disease strucked at 10/12/2003 05:07:00 PM

Mirror Reflection of Me...
She seek my thoughts. She is him and the other soul is me.

Dedicated to you my dear friend...I don't want another of me.
I elucidate my thoughts because you are dear to me.

Dear She,
You are him.
You feels like him.
You act like him.
You gave hopes like him.

Your intensity suddenly drives you to a limit of stopping.
You said u likes him with a but...
But u said it...u said, "He is not my type."
Do not succumb to that materialistics wants.
He is not a good that has been manufactured,
He was created by HIM. I was created by HIM.
Does HE create his beings with the purpose of categorizing them into different types?

You seek my thoughts.
I elucidate my thoughts.
I have told you. I don't want another of me.
It hurts.

He is my mirror reflection.
Shatter the mirror now.
Let it shattered now.
Of course it is going to hurt.
But insya Allah time will heal it.
He may forgive but never forgets.
I have forgiven but never forgets.

Don't leave him clueless...
Don't leave him with unanswerable questions.
If you do leave him...leave with explanations.
It shows your good intention. It shows you care.

Now I'm in love.
In love with the Almighty.
True Love.
I truly miss HIM.
When I miss HIM. I talks to HIM.
I express my love for HIM daily...
as I know HE loves me too.
Allhamdulillah.

"I think in the end selfish would be to love someone for other than the sake of the Creator but instead just for the Creation. People , in the end, are Creation. We should love Creation only for the Sake of the Creator. Otherwise, we are selfish and love Creation above the Creator."
- JasyhAllah, Islamicaweb.com -
Insomniac disease strucked at 10/12/2003 01:21:00 AM

Saturday, October 11, 2003

Last nite was beautiful...
The Sacred Nite was filled with the blessed communion of my loved ones. It was beautiful...Serenity filled the whole living space as we seek solace in HIM. The presence of my beloved friends....made it more beautiful. Their Nur from within outshine last nite. Insya Allah the days after....

My brother reciprocated HIS calling, standing guarded beside my father who was leading the blessed communion. I am proud of them, they stand guarded and added security in my life knowing we are moving on the lighted path.. Allhamdulillah. My mother was smiling...she's proud of them too . God has created both of them for her, for me and for those dear to me to earn us a place in Jannah. Insya Allah. Thank you Allah...for engulfing us in serenity and tranquility.

Thank you Allah...for waking me up last nite to be close to you.

HE woke me up to be close toHIM,
HE is my confidant
HE hears me.
HE sees me.

HE hears and HE sees...
What's hidden in my heart, my mind and my soul.

Woke up to express my gratittude,
Woke up to voice out my needs,
Woke up to be better me for HIM and for Others.
Woke up for HIS blessings.
Woke up to plea to HIM to love those who forsake HIM.
Woke up to love HIM

HE heard it...HE will act on it.
It will takes time...but HE will show it.
Insya Allah.

Insomniac disease strucked at 10/11/2003 05:49:00 PM

Friday, October 10, 2003

The Sacred Nite is here...
Let's serenade.....If You Ask Me by Yusuf Islam.

The Sacred Nite is here,
Will it be my last?
Only HE knows.
I shall cherish it...as if it is my last,
Will be cherishing it with my loved ones.
Will be waiting for my beloved friends to join this bless communion.
Allah has dedicated to us this sacred nite for....
HIM to be in close proximity with us and for HIM to hear us.
It could be your last. It could be. Only HE knows.

Extracted the article below from a website (I do not have the ability to translate it..opps fear of distorting it..:)
NISFU SYAABAN
1. Syaaban adalah bulan Rasulullah s.a.w. Bersabda baginda yang maksudnya, "Dinamakan dengan Syaaban (berserak-serak) itu adalah kerana di dalamnya terdapat banyak kebajikan yang berserak-serak."

2. Setiap amalan kebajikan akan digandakan oleh Allah dengan 700 kali ganda.

3. Allah akan menurunkan rahmatNya serta memberikan pengampunan umum kepada hambanya.

4. Sesiapa yang berpuasa 3 hari di awal, pertengahan dan di akhirnya maka Allah akan menuliskannya baginya pahala 70 orang nabi-nabi, pahala beribadat selama 70 tahun dan jika ia meninggal pada tahun itu maka ia akan mendapat pahala mati syahid.

5. Kelebihan malam nisfu Syaaban pula ialah sesiapa yang bangun mendirikan solat sunat dan menghidupkan malam itu dengan banyak berdoa, berzikir, berselawat, bertasbih, membaca al -Quran dan sebagainya maka Allah kan membukakan untuknya 300 pintu rahmat disamping doanya tidak akan ditolak.

6. Orang-orang yang tidak diampunkan oleh Allah pada malam nisfu Syaaban ialah mereka yang menyekutukan Allah dengan sesuatu, tukang sihir, tukang nujum, mereka yang suka bermusuhan, peminum arak, penzina, pemakan riba, derhaka terhadap kedua ibu bapa, pembuat fitnah dan mereka yang memutuskan tali silaturrahim.

Cherish it...
Insomniac disease strucked at 10/10/2003 03:15:00 AM

Wednesday, October 08, 2003

Bye Bye Miss Grouchiness....Hiii Mr Sunshine.
Since I read the hadiths Lyana posted at her blog...I wakes up before sunrise with the feeling of tranquility...knowing that I am waking up to answer to HIS calling. Wakes up every morning to commit charity deed for her, to make her smile. To make her feel less perfect. To gives her the security of our undying love for her.

Extracted fromLyana's blog
"During your sleep, Satan ties three knots at the back of your necks. He breathes the following into them, 'The night is long so keep on sleeping.' If the person wakes and praises Allah, then one of the knots is unfastened. And if he performs ablution, the second knot is unfastened. When he prays, all of the knots are unfastened. After that he will be energetic and happy in the morning. Otherwise he would get up listless and grouchy."

It is also recorded in Sahih al-Bukhari and Sahih Muslim that he said, "When one of you rises from your sleep he should make ablution. He should rinse his nose three times. For Satan stays in the upper part of one's nose during the night."

Al-Bukhari also records that the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked about a man who sleeps until the morning comes, that is, after the time of the dawn prayer. He said, "That is a man whom Satan has urinated into his two ears."

Waking up knowing....bossom friends are here to stay, past friends are back to refresh those beautiful memories, new friends awaiting for the time to arrive.

Sis Iman is my mentor. She was one of those that came into my life and gave me the freedom to reveal my true abilities and potential. As she is one of those who truly believes in me. Her guidance in helping me to build the humane side of me will always be remembered...always. To meet her again at this trying juncture...is HIS way of putting into place HIS other plans for me. Allhamdulilah.

Bro Moshee. Wow 1997, I didn't realized we met way back then. Now we meet again :). Didn't realized it was that long...that insomniac disease has strucked me...till now. Years back, from dawn till dusk...chatting was like a "staple" activity for me. But I met those through chatting that have made a difference in my life. Bro. Moshee I remember peeping you at the florist shopyou were working...hehe but being a shy lady..."very the shy" to approach. To meet someone...without expecting it and recalling those beautiful memories...is WOWnderful. True friends will come back if HE permits. Welcome back, my dear friends.

Mr Sunshine said Hii..to me today. I'm bright today. With hope it stays. Insya Allah.
Insomniac disease strucked at 10/08/2003 11:11:00 AM

HE made me feel today...
Allhamdulilah. The light heartedness sinked in today. Insya Allah, it will be forever. I am disgusted with myself for dwelling in devilish thoughts...after seeing her. Who is her?...will reveal soon:).

I am trying my very best to like HIM more. To love HIM more than i love or i will love anyone else. I want HIM to remind me not to forsake HIM..not even for a second. I know I am trying my very best and it will blossom. HE knows best as HE sees all and HE hears all. HE the Almighty. Insya Allah.

Dedicated to her,

Your nerves are not alerting you,
But you are still smiling,
Your anus is not at the created place,
But you are still smiling,
You ease through a tube that link to a bag for all to see,
But you are still smiling,
Your feet slumbers...not knowing when it will wakes up,
But you are still smiling,
Your dear one that vowed...till death do us apart...
is leaving without u knowing,
But you are still smiling,
In HIS eyes...you are not less his UMAT,
In OUR eyes...you are not less a woman, a sister, a daughter and a wife.
In MY eyes...you are my pillar for my strengths...You are my HERO.
I have promised myself to saunter under the morning sun to see you every morning.
I will. Insya Allah.

Insomniac disease strucked at 10/08/2003 01:45:00 AM

Saturday, October 04, 2003

Seek peaceful, heart, mind and soul from...
"(Iaitu) orang-orang yang beriman dan hati mereka menjadi tenteram dengan mengingat Allah. Ingatlah hanya dengan mengingat Allah hati menjadi tenteram"(Surah Ar-Rad (Guruh); Ayat 28)

Allhamdulillah. HE keeps me strong. Keeps me strong from all devilish acts and thoughts. At times , I still dwell in devilish thoughts for answers that i will never gain because the wound is still healing... but HE always pulled me back strongly. HE will heal it.
My parents have been my confidants, i seek guidance from them. Both of them have been calm in accepting what I have gone through. Their smiles never leave their faces...and their calm advise have always been, "It is HIS way of wanting you to learn from it, HE has other plans for you. Don't dwell, if you keep dwelling over it...means you have not succumb to HIS fate (redha)." I'm suprised they are still smiling...only sweet blessed words came out from their mouth, not a single word of "devilish acts", as they believe in HIM. My mother is silently hoping for a better tomorrow for me..n the day after...n the day after. We grow closer...she has seen me at my lowest point and she has never leave or turn away from me..from that moment. Syukran.

I don't want to defy HIM. Never.
I want HIM to bless my every acts. InsyaAllah
Insomniac disease strucked at 10/04/2003 07:51:00 PM